Royal Ass Kicker, At Your Service

  I will freely admit that I am the reigning Queen of fucked up relationships.  I mean, everyone has one or two by the time they hit my age, but mine have literally defined my whole life.  After that, emotional baggage just kinda comes with the territory, but in order to move on, it's mandatory to travel light.  This, of course, is just MY way of looking at things, and I can't speak for everyone else...but I CAN speculate and wonder how the fuck people think the way they do if their outlook differs.
Case in point:
  I was involved in a conversation with a man today whom I know well.  This particular man desperately wants to find true love, but is convinced he has too many past relationship 'issues' right now to be able to fully let someone in and fill that void.  That being said, this man has had exactly what he's been hoping for literally right in front of him for months, but couldn't see past his 'issues' to recognize his good fortune.  It should also be mentioned that his last serious relationship ended years ago, and he's had all that time since to work out whatever holes that left in him.  Sensible thinking would lead you to believe he would be healed for the most part by now, even if she did a number on him. I'm sure you see where I'm going with this...
  In a situation like this, I have to do some comparisons.  Tho I don't know the specifics, I know that their relationship, like many others, just wasn't working out and they went their separate ways.  No big drama.  Other past relationships ended much the same way, even if there maybe was a bit of drama and infidelity thrown in the mix-these things will, of course, make you a bit gun shy about the whole relationship thing; it's a natural reaction. An expected reaction. (It's also expected that eventually you dust your ass off and deal with the aftermath in a timely manner, but I digress...)
For comparisons sake, I'll use my own experiences.  In just my last relationship alone, I dealt with addictions (note the use of a plural), infidelity, abortion, depression, verbal, psychological, emotional and physical abuse, and the fucked in the head fact that despite all of the above, I was crazy mad in love with the man, which basically made it feel like I got a double dose of all the bad shit Every. Single. Time.  This was just ONE relationship.  This man bulldozed me from head to toenail, even driving me to the brink of suicide.

But I'm STILL here, and still have an open heart...
....albeit a Scotch-tape riddled one.

The moral of my story?  I know "issues".  I know "emotional baggage".  It has literally become my way of life.  The shit that I've gone through in one relationship drowns the shit he went through in all of his combined.  But if I can do it, what's stopping him?  After all of this, I can still stand here today with my heart in my hands hoping for a worthy someone to scoop it up.  I'm not afraid, and I went through the Seventh Circle of Hell.  Because of this, it's hard for me to grasp the idea that this man is "scared" or still has "issues" that prevent him from sacking up and opening his stupid eyes. Relationships are meant to serve as learning experiences, whether they last or not.  You learn what you don't want, and what you do. You also learn what not to do next time, and the kind of things you yourself can improve upon as a partner. Unfortunately you can't test out your new skills unless you TRY. (Hel-LO?!) Again, this is all common sense, and it's something that I hoped a smart guy like him would already know. You can really only lead a horse to water tho, so I'll just close with this:  

There's a big difference between having real issues, and just being plain lazy. Grow some fur on your huevos and get it while the gettin' is good, or watch love pass you by while you agonize over your imaginary problems. Angst doesn't look pretty on anyone, and crybabies just irritate me.

The Queen has now spoken. And she wants a Snapple, cuz this was exhausting.