Do I amuse you?

Sometimes I wonder if I'm God's practical joke. I wonder if He looks down on me and sees how I deal with the crap He throws at me everyday, and if he laughs while I suffer. I'm sure he gets a great chuckle at watching me run around all flustered and stressed out, trying to patch up one corner of my life while the others start crumbling away. He can obviously see that it's a futile effort, trying to maintain my life and sanity at once, but he knows that he "blessed" me with an unfaltering resolve to keep trying anyway. Its the worst kind of cruelty. Everybody needs entertainment tho, even God, right? Guess there's no escaping that.
I noticed that whenever I'm granted a little something, I can't seem to escape a few kicks in the ass to back it up. Nothing can ever just be good all the way around. Its as if Im only allowed a little, temporary morsel of happiness and contentment, only to have it sucked away as soon as I grab for it. I would sell my soul at this point just to have a charmed life. I don't mean financially either. I just want blissful happiness, and not have to lose in the process or wonder when its going away.
Im so envious of those with a great life; the ones who have happy marriages and great jobs and supportive families and great friends, and don't have to look over their shoulders when they go out driving somewhere. I would love to have that life where I didn't have much to stress over other than the normal things. I'd give anything for that, really.
They say that God has a plan for everyone. "They" didn't mention, however, that those plans aren't always nice or sweet or useful. Maybe my plan was to suffer like this-someone has to. I must be the one who has to sacrifice my own happiness so there's enough for everyone else. Im all for sharing, but damn- I would love a little slice of that pie too, without the strings attached for once.